My daughter not only got accepted into Emerson, her dream college, but said Dream College gave her a whopping $26K of grants and loans, leaving her with about $3,000 to make up the tuition difference. My ex and I will only have to worry about splitting the cost of an apartment in Boston.
SQUEE!
I've been skipping around with a stupid grin on my face because I feel such a burden has been lifted off of me.
SQUEE!
I'm enjoying it while it lasts.
- Mood:
ecstatic
He's pretty good and he catches on quick, so that's a plus. An even better plus is that he's in his mid-fifties, so he's looking for a place to be until he retires - my other two assistants were right out of college and ended up leaving to pursue other fields or go back to school. So maybe he'll stick around for awhile!
The play I was costuming is in production now, so I am done there. Now I just have to clean up my house for the cast party!
I don't know whether it's as a result of all the overwork or just wintertime, but I am just not wanting to do anything. Lots of stuff to do around the house, I haven't had an Ass To Chair Night in the studio for MONTHS, but I've been pretty much sitting around reading or watching TV.
I'm thinking maybe I'll call it a result of overwork, and cut myself some slack.
I *did* at least WALK into my studio... it's a disaster area. Maybe tonight I'll throw on my iPod and straighten everything up in there. Who knows? Maybe I'll feel motivated once everything's in its proper place.
- Mood:
blah
Work is so horrible right now. We got deluged with a ton of extra work - which should be a good thing - but the stress of getting everything out the door on time is getting to everyone, my boss especially.
Yesterday he had a major wig-out after my laser operator (who is pushing 70, BTW) made a mistake that meant we have to reprint 3000 sheets. He yelled and cursed and threw trays of paper across the room, and she ended up quitting on the spot and leaving in tears. I have worked with her for SIX YEARS and now she's gone, because he's an asshat. I was fighting tears back in my office most of the day yesterday, and am not much better today.
I've been working through lunches, working 1-2 hours late every night, and getting phone calls from second AND third shift at all hours of the night. Asshat called me this morning at 7am to send out a job remotely from home. And he was all cheerful - I wanted to push my fist through the phone.
I want to quit SO BAD. I want to leave NOW. But I can't, because of having a mortgage, and having a daughter who's still in college. So I'm trapped in this hellhole. And the frustration and stress is just making me exhausted and depressed.
I need to find a way to cope.
ETA: He came back to my office this afternoon to give me a gift card to thank me for my hard work recently, and I started blubbering and vented about the whole Betty (my operator) situation, saying that she makes my life so much easier because she gets things ready for me and other stuff.
He of course had a different version of the story (there were, however witnesses that say there WAS yelling and tray tossing). He then apparently asks his assistant to call Betty and see if she would come back.
Julie, the assistant just called me - Betty's coming back!!! Julie said she told Betty, "Kim's been crying for two days, Millie said she can't see how you managed the machine and the whole shop misses you!"
I get my Betty back... a small shaft of light (and a cool breeze) appears in Hell!
- Location:where else? The Hellhole
- Mood:
stressed
2. Make at least one piece of jewelry per month. (Now THAT'S doable.)
3. Get the Esty shop up and running.
4. Be grateful I have a job, and stop bitching about not being able to take time off, etc.
5. Think more kindly of myself.
- Mood:
contemplative
The director said the costumes made the play look like "a painting", which made me terrifically happy - it was the best thing anyone could have said to me about designing and making the costumes.
So now I have my life back... and I seriously need to get back on track with making and selling my art, whether it's jewelry or paintings. I signed up for an Etsy account, and am going to start taking some nice pics of the pieces I have in inventory. One of my jeweler friends is also going to try and get us into a craft show in Cape May next month, which would be great since that town attracts people with money.
I think Ass To Chair Tuesday needs to come back with a vengeance and expand to Thursday as well. Maybe one night can be at the jewelry bench and the other night at the easel!
Blessed Samhain!
- Mood:
artistic - Music:U2 - on Pandora
I definitely want to check out the Etsy website. Looks like I can have my own mini store, which will work great until I have the time to set up the Kimagine Designs website. I've got tons of the broken china jewelry left to sell, and have a half dozen "new" pieces that got created with the advent of "Ass To Chair Tuesday".
So we'll see... the play's over in a fortnight, and then I will have plenty of extra time. To get to WORK!!!
- Mood:
determined
My advisor isn't too fussed, says I'm well diversified, but I'm still afraid to look. This is money for Kate's last two years, - which, if she ends up going to Emerson wont go that far ANYWAY - and I'm really worried that we won't have enough. It WAS close to 38 grand before all this silliness started. Gods know what it is now. =(
Well, she has to get *accepted* into the place, so first things first, I guess.
I wasn't as nervous as I thought I would be. Although, we aren't actually *kissing* yet, so who knows how THAT will be. Our scene is going to be very lusty and grabby and slightly S&M - my fellow Goneril says "Ooh, it's so NASTY!" It's fun!
He apologized for coffee breath! Hee!
- Music:Pandora
2. Paste in your LJ and bold those things that are true.
I did "South Jersey" not "New Jersey" because the "New Jersey" ones tend toward North Jersey which, in some ways, is a completely different state.
One of your favorite X-File Episodes is the one about the Jersey Devil.
You don't "go to the beach", you go "down the shore".
You've had arguments over cheesesteak quality.
You know all of the "back roads" to get everywhere and prefer them to the expressway.
You've actually found the Echelon Mall. (Now called Vorhees Town Center)
You don't understand why there aren't more 24-hour diners elsewhere in the country. (This would be my daughter, who has discovered the joy of the 2-in-the-morning cheeseburger!)
You know what a Wawa is, and know the location of at least 15 of them.
You think a mountain is any landform taller than your house.
You know what became of the 13th Leeds child
You know what a "shoe-bie" is and can pick one out at the beach.
One time you were driving in the woods and got stuck in sand.
You live next to an inpenetrable swamp.
Even though there's a new Wal-Mart in your town, you still go to the Berlin Farmers Market for cheap stuff.
You know that you should get the hell out of Camden before dark.
You can name all the flavors of salt water taffy.
Your car is covered with yellow-green dust in April ann May.
You can smell and know when it's low tide.
F-16s buzz your house at like 150 feet.
You remember the bad gypsy moth years.
The Eagles/Giants rivalry has started fights at your school and/or local bar.
You eat at restaurants that have locations I, II, III, IV, and V.
You get excited when you see Chopper 6, and you can hum the Action News song.
You know that you don't put ketchup on boardwalk fries.
You know how to successfully handle a traffic circle.
You get three 50's in a row when you play skeeball.
You worked at a blueberry farm when you were 13.
You always went to the Franklin Institute when you were a kid.
You've run out of money on the Parkway.
You know what "cedar water" is. (see this post for Charlie's Cedar Water adventure
Your middle school hangout was the mall. (Wasn't everyone's?)
You know where to get the best bagel. (Einstein Bros. in Turnersville!)
Donald Trump is mentioned at least daily in your local paper.
You say "water" weird. (I personally don't. My mom's from the midwest, so I do not sound like I come from NJ)
You have pine trees, holly trees, and mountain laurel in your yard.
You had a sandbox.
You've rented a house in Stone Harbor before.
You've lived through hurricanes, nor'easters and fires, but have never seen a tornado, earthquake or volcano.
You can point to the two closest nuclear plants.
You can't believe MTV went to Seaside Heights.
You know that ACME is an actual store, not just a Warner Bros. creation.
You never had school on Rosh Hashanah or Yom Kippur.
You take day trips to New York City.
You don't have to go to red lobster to get fresh seafood.
You go to at least one parade at the boardwalk each year.
You remember when Rowan was Glassboro State and TCNJ was Trenton State.
You know New Years is all about the Mummers and the Polar Bear club.
You know what custard is in South Jersey. (AND what a Gelati is!)
Route 206 doesn't freak you out at night.
Because your town was founded before 1776, all the restaurants, taverns, and shops have "ye", "olde", and "colonial" in their names.
Your mom still loves Bruce Springsteen. (My mom was all about Tom Jones!)
You know it can be 70 degrees in January. (We had Christmas dinner at my brother Ron's house in Tom's River, and we all wore shorts!)
There's a fruit and vegetable stand down the road.
Am starting to get nervous about the literal "hands-on" aspect of this role... Goneril starts out repressed and unhappy, then gets VERY sexually aggessive. (Then ends up rabidly jealous and unhappy, then dead.) The thing is, I have personal space that's about a good yard around on all sides... I don't hug people easily, ESPECIALLY guys. Except gay guys, but none of the guys I work with in this production are gay. I've already got the repressed part down!
So there will be pawing and snogging and whatnot. I thought I'd be fine, since I'm friends with the main snogee, but now that it's NEXT WEEK my brain has started screaming, "What the FUCK did you get us into??!! I haven't seriously kissed a man in over 12 years!! (Which is another issue entirely, perhaps for another post.)
I am so afraid of looking (and/or acting) like a frumpy, middle-aged idiot.
- Mood:
intimidated
I *did* go into my studio the other night, but ended up just cleaning things up then sitting and staring at my empty easel.
Why is it so hard to do something I'm supposed to love doing???
Ugh.
- Mood:
apathetic
I've been up to my eyeballs in our production of Taming of the Shrew. ATC Night turned into ATSC (Ass to Sewing Chair) Night as I was in the final slew of costuming. Not to mention being IN the play as well, so all the extra rehearsals!
Actually tried delegating some of the costuming responsiblities this time, and what did it get me? The one woman gave me her four skirts a week before dress rehearsal, which was OK, but the sewing was pretty sloppy, which for future plays will NOT be OK. The other woman, to whom I gave TWO dresses SIX WEEKS before the play, did not have the dresses done until the night before Opening Night!!! The actresses who were meant for those dresses had to do a dress rehearsal without a dress! I was mortified. You can guess who will not be sewing for me again.
I'm looking forward to my time being somewhat my own again! Of course, until I have to start sewing for King Lear...
I've been avoiding any jewelry designs that would call for the use of a jeweler's saw, because it was always the bane of my existence. Blades would break left and right, and I couldn't saw the simplest thing without going through at least 3 blades.
Then, surfing around for something else entirely, I came across an online tutorial about using a jeweler's saw, and the woman gave a chart that told you what blade size to use with what gauge metal. Ooooooooh!
So last night I sawed, using the blade size recommended by her chart. Didn't break a SINGLE BLADE. It went so fast and easy I couldn't believe it! I had been using a #2 blade in the past, and was SUPPOSED to use a 3/0.
Basically, it was the equivalent of me using a chain saw when I should have used a fine Japanese hand saw!! (smacking forehead)
- Mood: impressed
So last Tuesday was my inaugural ATC (Ass To Chair) Night.
And it worked! Right after dinner, I went upstairs and tied on my work apron. After a little contemplation I started working on settings for a pendant and earrings of some beautiful green Chinese turquoise that I had. I was able to finish the rough work on all three, will polish them next week.
Then I played with the Art Clay Silver. I rolled and cut out my piece, then dried and fired it in my kiln. Now it's solid silver!
All in all, a VERY productive night! Now I'm excited for next Tuesday!
- Mood: artistic
FINALLY made something last night!
My friend ![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif){kind=small}
charliesmum asked me to make a pair of earrings for her mother, and we picked out some cool stones from another friend's huuuuuge cabochon collection.
I had only intended to start on the pieces, but got a burst of energy and ended up finishing them! 
The twisted edging was a bit of a challenge, haven't done one of those in a year or two. I have to get more practice with my soldering, I felt very clumsy.
While we were poking through all the stones I found some others that piqued my interest. So, more to come!
Can't wait until my silver clay comes in!
- Mood:
accomplished
...begin to take root and grow.
My creative process is finally awakening from its winter sleep! Ideas for jewelry pieces are starting to bubble up to the surface, and I've been scribbling and drawing furiously in my "idea sketchbook". I've starting working on pieces in my mind, trying to work out the best way to get want I want.
As I am a lazy jeweler who HATES sawing, I am going to give silver clay a whirl. I've also got my eye on a mini scroll-saw that will make cutting shapes easier.
I'm very excited about my current design ideas - if I can pull it off I will have some VERY nice pieces that should definitely be able to get into a gift gallery.
Ugh - must find a place in Philly where I can get some silver clay tomorrow!! I want to work on it NOW!!!
- Mood: excited
Uggghh. All I want to do is sit around and do nothing.
I have a ton of stuff I *could* be doing. And *should* be doing.
There are two websites I have to cough up... one for a friend and revamp one for my sister-in-law's business. (Am only going to get paid by my sis-in-law). I am only a casual web designer, and only do it because a) I don't want to pay other people to do my stuff, and b) I feel bad letting my friends pay other people for THEIR stuff. But people know I do stuff for myself, I get asked, and I have a hard time saying no.
Of course, both of these people want their site as soon as possible. Both projects are stressing me... Sis-in-law's will involve online ordering and shopping carts, which I don't know how to do (yet!). So a lot of learning curve there. And she wants it right away! For my friend's site I'm running into creative block - I just can't get my head around his jewelry line and he talks about wanting it to look "high-end" and... ugh. And HE wants his site up ASAP.
And so I've fallen back to my usual response to this kind of deadline stress - Sitting Around And Doing Nothing.
- Mood:
aggravated
(but now I'm a Level 7 Elven Mage!)
Aaaarrrggghhh! Why do I have to be such a frickin' perfectionist?!
I have tried three times this past week to start a "small, simple" still-life. "Small, simple" being my stated goal for this year to try and Just Paint More. I get so caught up in trying to do a Really Good Painting that I end up with nothing. It's sad that of my last three finished pieces, two were for a class and one was a Christmas present.
I set up two etched glass & silver salt/pepper shakers on a doily... Ugh - NOT SIMPLE. (Would look really cool, but NOT SIMPLE.)
I set up a box of Girl Scout Thin Mints, a box of Trefoils and piles of both cookies on another doily... NOT SIMPLE, NOT particularly SMALL, either. I ate the cookies to console myself. (so much for the losing weight goal...)
I set up a funky blue vase on a red & white tea towel... then bitched to myself about how I needed a better piece of "distressed" wood under it all, and how I should wait until I got that, so it would be a "better" painting.
End Result = NOTHING. I have GOT to get over this stupid mind-set!!
- Mood: aggravated
Then the Kate/Petruchio scenes started, and our lone Petruchio (more came later) read with all these different Kates. He was VERY physical and very "Marlboro Man" and soon all the Kates were getting kissed, grabbed and slung around all over the place. It was hySTERical! And I'm sitting off to the side laughing myseld silly and thinking what fun that looked like, but I was too afraid to say I wanted to do it too.
Time passed, and other scenes were done, but I kept thinking about wanting to be in on the fun of that first scene. And how I constantly don't do things I want to because I'm afraid. Afraid of looking stupid, afraid of people thinking "why does SHE want to do that?" and I guess of what people think in general. I try SOOO HARD to live up to the mindset of the late great physicist and prankster Richard Feynman, whose autobiography was titled, "What Do YOU Care What Other People Think?" but I get paralyzed. Then I regret what I didn't do.
So, I'm sitting there getting more aggravated with myself, and I thought, "Dammit! Just do it! Have fun for the sake of having fun!" It helped that another woman there also wanted to try the scene, so we asked the director.
AND I DID IT! And it was soooooo fun! I was a full-on bitch as Kate, and ended up getting grabbed, kissed, thrown on the floor and tussled with. And loved every inhibition-freeing minute of it.
- Mood: satisfied
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